That day is one I know will stay with me forever.. The getting up crazy early, the way my best friend Jess and I ended up sat in the boot of the land rover casually waving at random people in cars and buying Heat magazine at Kings Cross station because "the song told us to."
It's one I'll remember for all of the wrong reasons too though, and I don't think I'll ever be able to hear Wonderwall without thinking of you. Because that trip was the last time we were all together and when I look at the photos it still doesn't seem real that you're not here anymore.
I remember exactly where I was when I found out, because things had been weird all day. There was something we weren't being told, we all knew it. Then Katie showed us the damn newspaper. You were all over page 2 and I'm sure you'd have loved the attention.. I didn't believe it at first. You were vibrant, over confident and your love of life, always infectious. How could you be gone?
I remember us having to discuss replacing you, because the group couldn't run without a young leader. None of us wanted that. They asked me but I never could've done it like you and I wouldn't have wanted to. But the group disbanded after that although I'm pretty sure you'd have wanted us to continue because I know it was your life.
I just miss you, and I wish I could tell you that you're the reason I got my shit together and that you made me see what life could be if I gave it a chance. Love you Clairebear ❤
